Proverbs 1 Wisdom to love well
July 1st 2017 marks the 15th anniversary of my younger brother's death. My brother was the funniest person I have ever known. To this day, thinking of him just makes my heart leap with joy. He could make anyone laugh at any time. I can remember times at the dinner table not being able to breathe because we were laughing so hard over something he said or did.
He had such a steadiness about him. I do not think we ever had a cross word with each other. He was one of those people who was able to just let things roll off his back. I wish I could be more like him. Oddly, I think losing him gave me just a bit of the perspective he must have had in order to be that way. The perspective of understanding the importance of a thing. Most things just aren't worth getting that upset over.
Life is so short. There are too many beautiful things to enjoy to walk through life being upset and bothered. Time is too precious to waste it that way.
Do I wish that my boys had him in their life? Absolutely! Do I think he would have been the most fun uncle ever? Without a doubt! Do I think they could have learned incredible things from him? For sure! Do I know though that losing him made me a better mom?
Watching my parents agony over losing their third son through his death gives me the perspective of the gift that my boys are. My parents are stronger than I ever hope to have to be. I am in awe of their grace, and strength , and love of life. I have learned that loving someone isn't just an emotion that you feel towards a person. Loving someone is the actions you take for that other persons benefit when it's hard to do so.
When you're angry, tired or sad- reacting to that person with kindness anyway.
Loss is hard. It is gritty and painful and leaves scars for sure. When my younger brother died it was the third phone call I received informing me of a siblings death. To this day, if my phone rings at an odd time I panic. If I see my parents name on the caller ID and it seems like a strange time for them to call I hesitate and brace myself before I answer. There are very hard things I carry forward from the losses our family has had.
Yet, there are other things I carry forward too. I know that each of the people God has given to me is a gift. Truly a gift of love given to me by my Heavenly Father. Because He loves me so much, He has allowed me to be a part of their lives and for them to be a part of mine. I try so hard to not forget that. To not take them for granted. To recognize how beautifully and wonderfully God created them to be .
I am so thankful for the gift that each of you are in my life. I hope I love well. I hope this wisdom encourages you to love well also.